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[Aug. 30th, 2011|08:33 pm] |
Hitwizards.
Do me a favour and don't change into zombies anytime soon. I know I've been awful about being in contact lately, but imagine how much worse I'd be if I had to do your paperwork.That's right. A lot worse. So if you're on Tinworth duty, bubblehead charms. Actually, if you're on Tinworth duty, full hazard suits would be preferable at this point. If you want to volunteer for Tinworth guarding, on the other hand, that would be great.
Also, between us, I think we should be in charge of finding the next death eater. That would be fun.
End Ward
My children are, once again, back at Hogwarts. And I am so happy, as awful as that sounds. They really are amazing, but Wallace has turned fifteen and he has a girlfriend and he spent the whole summer showing off to her. With the dragons. We were in CII at least five times. Luckily I think they're broken up now. He's going to have to find a girl with safer tastes. |
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[Jan. 30th, 2011|09:16 pm] |
[Warded to Hitwizards]
All right. So there's a few things I'd like to touch base with you on, obviously. The first thing, as I know you know, is that Aurors are now able to use Unforgivable curses. Which I am going to keep my personal opinion out of because honestly, it's nothing we can control, and it's already decided on. I know that it puts us at a disadvantage, but please try to remember that we're working with the Aurors as a single department. It isn't a competition and especially now, I don't want there to be any bad feeling between us. We have to work together to keep people safe.
And then I'd like to commend you all (belatedly) on the whole Savage situation. I know that it was hard to be at work for extended hours, but get used to it, since hopefully it will happen again. With a real death eater. Not some healer dressed up as a death eater. You understand what I mean.
We really do need to have a meeting about all this soon, and can I just ask you all to please keep your desks tidy? It's looking like a paper forest in here. Scrimgeour's lion thing is going to start getting ideas and camping here permanently. Next time one of you does something else wrong, I'm going to make you clear out everyone's. And it's not cruel because it's necessary. |
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[Dec. 22nd, 2010|06:47 pm] |
[Warded to Oakden Hobday]
Oakden, we need to talk. |
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[Dec. 20th, 2010|10:45 am] |
[DMLE]
I'm checking in. Is everyone okay? I was at the performance last night. I didn't manage to arrest anyone and I was shuttled off to Mungo's before I managed to finish the filing. Was anyone arrested? I'll come in to help as soon as possible but they need to try to correct my leg first since I'd be no use to anyone with a limp. Apparently. I don't quite believe that.
[End Ward]
[Family]
THIS IS WHY I DON'T GO TO BALLETS.
Never again.
Is everyone okay? |
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[Dec. 13th, 2010|10:09 pm] |
I fail so miserably at Christmas.
Our tree has caught fire no less than three times, I've stabbed myself trying to make bloody popcorn garlands about ten times more than infinity, no one has a proper gift, and the most festive thing around is our Welsh Green that got into the apples.
I guess I'll tell Harvey to just pick up a new tree and make some puddings and then it'll be okay. |
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[Dec. 6th, 2010|09:59 pm] |
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So I realize I left work ten minutes early last week and I will gladly take any cuts to my pay, but I seriously needed a new pair of trousers. Mine were burned through. These alterwhateverthings are not working, and I kind of miss the poop. But not really. Please don't quote me on that. |
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[Nov. 15th, 2010|09:43 pm] |
[Warded to the DMLE minus Barty Crouch]
I'm getting a nice soup fund for Barty. If anyone would like to help me with this and knows how to make soup, please let me know.
Also I think we might leave the doors to his office open just so the owls remaining can go back and forth. That would be nice of us, yeah?
[END WARD]
[Warded to family]
Everyone all right? Checking in on the pox status, that's all. Wallace got sick and didn't tell me about it til it was over. And now I've promised to come bring him home by his ear if he doesn't tell me something that serious again. I think I may have overshot because his apology letter sounded pretty convincing. I'm sending him a chocolate frog to make up for it. That's what you do in this kind of situation, right?
I'm bad at this.
[END WARD] |
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[Nov. 11th, 2010|10:31 pm] |
Dear people of the universe/wizarding world,
We at the DMLE realise you're frustrated. No really. You've all made that point many, MANY times over. Thing is, owling us won't do a thing about it except make the owls unhappy for flying and make us unhappy for getting another batch of droppings on our heads. Not that any has actually been on my head, but you understand. Anyway. I'm tired of writing the world a letter now, so I think I'll end this by saying if anyone wants to apply to clean at the Ministry I'm sure someone's hiring an emergency cleaning crew. Or if not, come here and clean and I'LL pay you out of my pocket. I'm not sure that's legal, so maybe don't come. But really, seriously, I would love someone to clean. Maybe my husband would do it. Harvey's pretty good at cleaning since I make him do it all the time. But I suppose that's not what he gets paid to do. Pity.
[Warded to Hitwizards]
Make sure you're taking EXTRA precautions with the whole Dragon Pox thing circulating, yeah? I don't want any of you getting ill. I certainly don't want to get ill. SO I've a whole batch of Immunity Potions and I'll give them out. You're WELCOME! I just don't think we can afford to get sick right now. I wish I could give you a noseblocking potion too, but I don't think they make those. Thank you for being brilliant. Hang in there.
[END WARD] |
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[Nov. 1st, 2010|09:15 pm] |
[Warded to Hitwizards]
Right. So how is everyone, after yesterday? I hope no one's too banged up. This has been a bad weekend.
But I think it'll get better. And you know, no one's dead this time, and everyone's recovering. That's more than we could say before, yeah?
Anyway. I'd like a volunteer or two to go to St. Mungo's to watch after the wounded students while they're there. Anyone?
[END WARD]
[Warded to Family]
How are you? How are the kids? Mine were all right, they owled this morning, thank Merlin.
And I haven't heard anything but I hope they're all right.
[END WARD] |
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[Oct. 26th, 2010|09:26 pm] |
[Hitwizards]
Okay.
I don't know what anyone has told you, but in case this is a bubble in the room we have to pop or something, I'm the deputy head of the Hitwizards now. Yeah. I'm not expecting congratulations or anything, mostly since my duties will continue on and I will be working alongside you just the same as I've been doing all this time. If there isn't mutiny, I'd appreciate it, but if there must be, that's okay too. Basically you know I'm quite fond of you all and I hope to work with you more and more. Since I'll be spending even more time here now. Right. So hag week: we need to be on the lookout ALL week, but most especially the Pride Parade on the 30th. I'm sure we'll need all hands on deck. Let's keep going strong, yeah? |
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[Oct. 20th, 2010|02:57 pm] |
[Hitwizards]
Holy Merlin.
That was awful.
I hope everyone's ok except.
Oh Neil. |
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| THIS WAS AT ITS PROPER TIME |
[Oct. 10th, 2010|09:37 am] |
[DMLE]
So I've an official report coming your way a little later, Mr. Crouch, but I thought it might be best to fill you all in on what happened at Gladrags today. Some people in masks came into the shop and began crucio'ing the owner. And now he is sort of angry. Which I guess I'd be too, if I was the one choking on the sweetie that the bastards gave me. I did tell him to not take food from strangers, but he didn't really appreciate that. Anyway, that is what happened, I've the report almost done, but I'm hanging around the shops here for a while to make sure that nothing else happens, what with the veritable rash of attacks lately.
[END WARD]
[WARD TO LEO YAXLEY]
HE WON'T STOP YELLING AT ME.
THIS WAS NOT MY FAULT.
And I can't really just walk away either. I'm pretending to be very busy with paperwork. Come talk to him. You're calmer than I am! Because I know and I feel bad for him but honestly if he keeps complaining I am going to hit him and then I'll lose my job. And can't we just Obliviate him? Oh god I sound awful. I'm not a death eater, Leo. [End Ward] |
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[Sep. 30th, 2010|09:11 pm] |
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I can't get to my next patrol assignment via floo, which is a PROBLEM, because I have to show some discretion (aka no loud cracking noises) and was scheduled to go via...well yeah. Floo. And now it's blocked or something, so can someone please get to that? Soon, preferably? I'm keeping this an open ward so if anyone's a secret FLOO GENIUS you can just let me know. Hey thanks! |
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[Sep. 21st, 2010|08:59 am] |
[Warded to Hitwizards/Aurors...Who are not of the SUPERIOR CROUCH variety, tyvm]
I need to be doing something more than just bloody sitting here, so if anyone actually needs any help, please let me know and I'll pretend I got orders instead of actually waiting for them.
Thank you.
In other news, is everyone ok? |
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[Sep. 12th, 2010|08:53 am] |
[Warded to Mairead Davies]
Mai, you're going to have to help me. I turned the duvet cover lime green in the wash somehow. And now it's sticking that way. Please tell me what to do before I just cut it up and buy a new one.
OR! Just please come shopping with me for another duvet cover.
[End Ward]
Weekends are REALLY overrated when you realise your husband has gone back to work and doesn't have time to clean anything anymore. I'm beginning to see the perks of domestic help. But I'd rather spend money on more things to dust and wash. It's a VICIOUS, vicious cycle.
I have a new favourite dragon on the compound though! Just a Welsh Green but quite feisty. About six months old, recently found and adopted. And my favourite.
And that was my weekend, I hope yours were more exciting. |
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[Sep. 8th, 2010|09:54 am] |
[Hitwizards]
Well fuck.
I'm kind of glad I wasn't on duty.
Everyone all right?
Damage control's going to be a bitch, isn't it.
Also how the HELL did that happen, didn't they have her stalked like 24-7??? |
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[Sep. 6th, 2010|08:43 pm] |
[Hitwizards/witches]
I am not foreseeing any arrest opportunities at the Prophet. They make better coffee than our office though. I have a quills for everyone now. I'm going to make one of the interns get me biscuits to go with the delicious coffee. I've also completed the crossword for three days from now since I've made friends with its creator.
Also this is really boring and no one strange has come in the door all day. So far. |
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[Sep. 4th, 2010|09:02 am] |
All I saw in the Branstone editorial was opportunity. Now all we have to do is follow her around and zap the flies that try to get her.
But I still say "DEATH EATERS ARE BAD AND I HATE THEM. PS, THEY EXIST" isn't so much inflammatory as just TRUE. Right?!
Here, I'll do it too.
DEATH EATERS ARE BAD PEOPLE.
THEY ARE NOT FRIENDLY
THEY USE QUESTIONABLE METHODS.
Done. |
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